Conscious Conversations Save Us: 6 Tips for Connecting Soulfully During This Pandemic
The COVID pandemic keeps rearing its ugly head in anticipatory second waves, a deathmonger spreading both disease and fear around our planet.
Simultaneously, we are less able to comfort each other physically because of social distancing and necessary precautions. Yet, authentic connections with other people soothe and inspire us. In true presence, we see not just the eyes and face of another being, but also feel their Essence. We don’t merely interact, dancing with the interplay of their body and its language, but we’re joining with their Being, all of our core self intermixing with the totality of who they are. Call it love. Call it healing power. This is the most needed medicine to any halt disease. Since we humans are not really separate, there is energy uniting us, and that is part of the vibrating joy we experience during deep contact.
Call to Action: Adapt and Change
A component of conscious bravery is adapting to change and changing ourselves. To combat COVID, we’ve got to expand our loving powerful Presence so that it is felt and experienced in our dynamic interactions, whether over screens or in person. We can do this! We can do difficult things. And we’re called to now.
I have a candle alit while writing this blog, to connect to you, my friend. I’ll ask that you please light now as well: let’s warm our rooms with Presence marked by light as we consider soulful connections further
Physical touch, actual contact, is part of what we all long for during this unprecedented and constantly changing pandemic. Especially because of physical detachment, isolation and even quarantining, we need meaningful, vibrant, awake connections with others. Since we can’t hug as freely, or even view the faces of others through their masks, we’ve got to be even more intentional to experience our Presence differently than before, then share it.
Here are 6 tips for Connecting Soulfully During This Pandemic
1) Find Your Presence Frequently
How can we connect with others unless we are in close relation to ourselves? Our need to experience our personal bubble of Presence is foundational. Presence surrounds us, and connecting with it sources our vibrancy, love, grace, integrity, peace, bravery and power. With focus and practice, we can extend it over screens via Zoom, FaceTime and Google Duo calls and other people can feel it. This requires frequent realignment, going inside to our Essence and residing in Presence. New commitment, intention, and focus during meditation and moments of conscious breathing will recalibrate us in our zone of Presence more often.
Desire for joining with others consciously and more often is not enough. We’ve got to use different tools to experience and convey connection. It will take our conscious bravery to adapt, live and behave from a place of not just knowing that we are all connected but energetically living it.
2) Talk About Feelings Vulnerably
Since over screens we don’t have physical, in-person contact where we can “feel” the other person’s energy field, the language of emotions is crucial for real connection. Allow yourself to freely get to the heart of the connection you want by putting your presence boldly and openly out front. When we’re face to face with someone, our big smile exudes the energy of happiness we feel. Over screens we can say: “It’s so nice seeing your face!” Or even, “Seeing your face brings me joy.“ “It’s great connecting with you” affirms the feeling of mutuality in your meeting.
By freely offering your presence through words and openhearted body language, you’re not being overly emotional as some of us fear. You’re engaging with the other person. Engagement increases connection and a sense of unity. Simply try opening your heart along with your mind, offering a few feelings words during a conversation. Go for reciprocity too, asking the other person, “What did you feel?” and they’ll likely respond both emotionally and with the sense that you want to understand them, to know them.
3) Bring Meaning and Ask Questions That Matter
When we mention what we feel in a conversation, others respond with interest because we’re speaking to what matters to us. Most people are curious to hear about ideas, and dreams too, as much or more than typical conversations regarding what’s happening or what someone said or did. Take the level of discussion to the top tier: by talking about something that has meaning, then asking a question. Saying something that they care about takes things to a higher level than occurrences, such as merely the weather. For example: you’re on a Zoom call with a colleague. Try offering, “I liked the way you spoke about strategizing last week. I was reflecting on your comments just a minute ago and feeling encouraged.” Or, “You really seem glad when your staff are more than merely succeeding, but when they truly like their jobs, don’t you?” You’ve engaged with them, remembered what they said, and expressed how you feel, and they’ll respond in kind.
By joining the other person in spirit and meaning, our confident, gentle built-in familiarity brings implicit safety and soothing. What do all of us want right now? To feel like we’ll get through this time, that we’re safe, that it’ll be okay. I live with the assumption that others want to feel a pleasant connection, not a negative one that’s based upon me voicing a complaint about the weather or traffic. In the pulse of the moment, engage with a question or comment that’s real to you, that’s spontaneous, one that is pertinent to what is going on. Nothing prescribed. Not a “line.” We all see right through those, even if we do answer them to appease the other person. When you go for real connection with interest in your heart about what matters, you won’t be fake. Conscious conversation will likely ensue.
An example, we ask questions with the word what (not why): “What did that do for you?” “What did you notice in yourself when that happened?” Why tends to put others on the defensive. Asking what, we are exploring and curious. Even if the other person isn’t quite sure, the question brings depth to the conversation, and they sense that it’s okay to share on a larger, more profound level.
4) Offer Your Presence. It’s a Gift
Your mindful, real presence exuding from your Essence is a gift to give; it’s not meant to be kept in your heart, protected, as if in a box to be opened only for Christmas. Your Essence exudes energy of shining light and captivates others. When we really look into their Beingness as they speak, we link with their same sparkling pockets of positivity. Presence is a present we give not only ourselves but others, every day.
We all know what it feels like when a friend or acquaintance breaks the barrier of the expected and moves into the expansive zone of the Velveteen Rabbit Real. They get vulnerable. Real and raw. Realness brings out the best in us, doesn’t it? We’re immediately interested, and the conversation we’ve begun to have enchants us and we don’t want it to stop. Presence is as refreshing as gelato on a summer’s day.
5) Access Your Joy and Share It in the Now
Soulful connection emerges when we access moments of joy then spontaneously share them in the Now. Both finding our lightheartedness and conveying some of it in the moment brings relief and focus to any conversation. You know when this happens: the other person says something funny or clever, and suddenly your brain is firing a clever comment back. Bang! You’re both more present, because humor and laughter bring us right here, right now. The psychological benefits of relief and elation are great. Being in the present moment we are able to access joy, be more creative and efficient, and brainstorm solutions with greater flow.
Your ability to share your saturation in the Now will deliver that immediacy to the other person. Most people don’t mind being awakened out of their fog of self-protection, if it’s done with grace and kindness. Good intention can’t be faked, so try walking around with your heart wide open, with compassion for others and for yourself, knowing most people experience a sense of loneliness and disconnect right now.
Consider ending conversations with something like, “Loved our connection,” or “I wish you well.” Offering joy and faith in wellness helps to maintain the sense that we can continue to create it together.
6) Listen. Listen. And Keep Listening
We love some of our favorite friends and family most because they’re good listeners, right? They look in our eyes. They truly want to hear what we feel, have been through, and our ideas. Irritating people talk and talk and talk. They don’t listen well. They ask questions, maybe, but it almost seems as if they want one-sentence answers so they can tell us more about them. What do good listeners do? They engage with their hearts, bodies and their inner being, truly networking on the energy web with us. They’re attentive, awake, alive with interest. We feel seen! Heard! Understood. And, better about ourselves because we matter to them. This vibrant union occurs when we listen and are listened to, both hearing and seeing our unique and special friends, loved ones and associates. Listening is captivating, empowering and soulful.
Vibe With Soulful Interest and Magic Can happen
We’re all different, and uniqueness is the core of our Beingness. With Conscious bravery, we adjust to change and live in the new Now. We hone our skills for beautiful, powerful, fun connection with others in person and on screens and our conscious conversations happen with synchronicity and magic. Let’s put out the vibe of soulful interest and adapt!